Staying Afloat Around People with Draining Energies
- Hattie Lewis
- Aug 8, 2021
- 3 min read
While cutting negative people out of your life can be the quickest way to get rid to a toxic vibe, sometimes that isn't as easy as it seems. Here are my top tips to maintaining your own mental well-being, sanity and positivity until you're in a place to safely let those negative relationships go.
First of all, are you sure this person needs to stay in your life? Sometimes a negative relationship - be that a friendship, a partner or just someone you interact with regularly enough to bring your vibe down - is actually more escapable than it seems. However, some relationships are unfortunately really difficult to cut loose. Relationships with people such as family members or work colleagues - people you would struggle to avoid on a daily basis - can feel impossible to break free from. So if you can't get free just yet, what can you do to protect yourself from the negative vibrations?
1. Create emotional distance
Distance isn't just physical - emotional distance is essential to creating a protective barrier between yourself and a draining person. To create emotional distance, try looking outside of that relationship for emotional support, and should they come to you for emotional assistance, keep the discussion to a minimum. No need to be rude, but no need to go above and beyond either - if they don't ask for advice, don't give it, and if they do ask, keep it short and simple.
2. Create physical distance.
Physical distance is probably the most effective method of self preservation. Try to stay away from this person as much as possible. If it's a colleague or classmate, avoid them outside of work or school hours, and where possible, avoid working in close proximity. If you have opportunities to work alone or with others, strive for that. If it's a close friend or family member try to take up new activities that don't involve them. Seek out new or different friendships, find hobbies that take you away from the environment in which you see this person.
3. Find time for you
Make yourself as resilient as you can be by nursing your confidence and sense of self worth. A self care day on your own is perfect to align yourself with your true thoughts and emotions, rather than allowing a negative person to dictate their emotions onto you. The stronger your sense of self, the less their bad vibes can drag you down.
4. Recharge
Everyone recharges in different ways, find what works for you. People with negative energies can drain you to the bone, so it's essential to find ways to recharge back to the full version of yourself; especially if this is a person you can't truly cut out of your life just yet.
5. Rethink
What is actually holding you back from letting this person go? Being alone is a hugely daunting thought, but in reality can bring peace and a deeper appreciation for relationships that truly enrich your life. Is being alone really that bad?
There will always be draining people in the world, the world is a draining place, but everyone is capable and deserving of kindness, positivity and good vibes - be one of those people, and don't ever be afraid to let someone go if they're not adding to your life. You are complete on your own, anyone else should only add to what you already have, not take away. Good luck out there - keep your chin up, you're stronger than you think!
PSA: this post is aimed at people struggling with draining friendships, colleagues or acquaintances. This advice is not for people struggling with toxic or abusive partners. If this has affected you in anyway please make use of the resources below:
Phone numbers:
Domestic Violence Assist: 0800 195 8699
Women's Aid Domestic Violence Helpline: 0808 2000 247
Men's Advice Line: 0808 801 0327
Websites:
Women's Aid: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/
Men's Advice Line: https://mensadviceline.org.uk/
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